Saturday, June 10, 2006


I recieved an unexpected phone call from someone last night. When I picked up the phone the person on the other side just asked "Hey Alice.. remember me ?". Since there was no caller-ID showing... all I could say was.. "No... who is this ?".

It was my first boyfriend. My puppy love. The guy I thought I would never break up with. Yet spent the last year with him plotting my escape route.

After the initial shock, I asked him how he was. (Just to break the ice). He replied he was doing well then asked me if he could ask me a question. I told him, sure.. since he had already asked one already.

"What was the first birthday present you gave me".

No idea.

I told him I didn't know and I didn't want to remember.

"Ok... can you remember any of the presents you gave me ?"

I told him "No".

After which he said he wishes me all the best and just hung up.

I spent the rest of my sleepless night thinking about that one question. I eventually did remember what I got for his birthday. But in the process of digging through the past, I also remembered everything else I went through because of him.

Everything I did for him and everything I put up with before calling it quits.

I bailed him out of jail. Took out a loan to pay off his court fees. Something that took me 5 years to pay off. Caught him in bed with a girl. (A girl I later became good friends with). And the slap across my face I had to ignore, just so that my brother wouldn't have him beaten up.

To be fair, it wasn't all bad. There were good times, otherwise I wouldn't have been in a 3 year relationship with him.

5 years to forget everything. And for one phone call and one silly question to bring it all back.

Thinking back now, I am amazed by all the things I was able to take in and just live with it and actually think it was ok. All because I loved him.

I guess you are allowed to be stupid once in your life.


Can't Design said...

this is the best thing i read today. hi, am from India. it also takes me one encounter/one pix with my first love (a relationship i had for 10years) to bring all memories back and what I had to put up with. Yes i agree 100% that we are allowed to be stupid once, just once in our lives. Once is enough to give u t right perspective.

Hairy Crab said...

the best thing is you have move on from this 'bad' relationship.

All relationships, good or bad is a learning process. Even if you are in a good relationship, there are things to learn to make it better.

Anonymous said...

i m also shocked when i read your better how the relationship turn up to be...there were still things for us to learn and to remember...although digging all these things from deep down in your heart is painful...but is also good as when after some years you bring it up will know how foolish u were and be smarter in the future...that is our learning process....the most important thing is to get over the bad things and move on in your don't think about it and get some sleep.... :)

-mrs ang-

- chi sin - said...

Not everyone is lucky enough to start puppy love and goes onto marriage, till death aparts. Those who gone thru and separated will always remember the happy and sad times. Good or bad, memories will stay there anyhow, so be happy about the good memories and just learn to laugh your bad ones!

Umm... thinking back, i don't really remember the first pressie i gave my ex... but i still remember the last one... I still remember alot of things...
Yeah hey!! I am not TOOOOO old!! hahahah

AstroGirl said...

can't design... i can't agree more.. once is enough. btw, your designs are really good. I like the green cover you did for april.

hairy crab... it was a very expensive learning process. i have definately moved on, but i guess first love will always stay forever.

mrs ang... trying my best not to think about it anymore. :)

chi-sin... u r always so sensitive about your age .. no one has said you are old !! maybe my next post should be titled.. "10 reasons why chi-sin is old"... j/k.... :P

On Jai said...

Had no idae that sob caused such damage. You are were right not to tell your bro, 'coz I'd be first in line to kick his sorry ass. But good on you for moving on and looking ahead rather than dwelling on the past. We're all here for you if and when you are in need, just say the word and we'll be there. Right now I still need some TLC after our cruel end to the world cup... *sob* *sob*