Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Small Talk

Question. What constitutes as cheating ?

Is it only considered to be cheating when you have physically cheated on your other half ?

Or the moment you fall for another person when still engaged in another relationship ?

Or isit acceptable to just periodically 'Mind Cheat' ?

Don't get me wrong, I don't believe there is anything wrong with looking at and admiring attractive people. If I couldn't, then there would be no purpose for me to go and watch movies anymore.

But where do you draw the line ?

Could you accept that your other half will flirt with other people he occasionally meets at pubs and clubs. Or vice versa ?

I don't know where I stand on this issue. Mostly because I don't want to appear to have double standards. But I can safely say, I have never physically cheated on any of my ex-boyfriends (and including the current one). But that is physically. And mostly because I would just end the relationship before starting another one.

But what my heart feels is another entirely different issue.

For example, I know that whenever I speak to Him, I would forget all else and can just happily chat the night away. But I have learnt through experience, that your perfect soul mate may not be the person you hold most dear in your heart. And I am old enough now to know I should not just 'move on' based on feelings alone.

As to double standards, I'm yet to find out how I would feel if my other half had a similar 'friend' in his life. At the moment, I feel that I give him as much freedom as I possibly can simply because I want to expect the same amount of freedom back. In the end, I guess it is all about Trust. And the 'line' (which waits to be crossed) differs with the amount of Trust that exists in a relationship.

And the perfect soul mate ?

For me, at this moment, it's finding that special someone to bend our heads together over a Sudoku puzzle... to share my paper with on a Sunday morning... who'll steal my blankets on a cold night... console me when I've drunk too much alcohol, picks me up and hold my hair back when I spew... lies to me when I ask 'does my butt look big in this?' and takes my side on everything ... except maybe when it comes to football.

1 comment:

- chi sin - said...

Well... difficult blog to reply.

if i am still in the old days when i was still pak talling... i won't even have the time to cheat in any aspect. too devoted I guess... basically i'm like a 24x7 body guard (almost), on top of that i am sortta "have girl friend no normal friends" in those days... hahahaha...

nowadays, I believe in giving space to the other half while maintaining my own social circle. (although i dun have the chance to put that into practice though... wot a joke)

As you say it's about trust, and if you really trust him enough, I think you don't have to hide anything from him/her (and hopefully they do the same in return, tell you what happened to them) Say you just finished chatting with your close friend, you can tell your other half ! if you talk, then there'll be no problem!

[quote]I am old enough now[/quote]